My 25th Birthday Party with the Sex Pistols at the Holiday Inn
DOA/Sex Pistols Tour Chapter 23: January 11, 1978
NARRATOR: In our last episode, John Holmstrom gave his summary of the 1978 Sex Pistols US tour shows, and several of Roberta Bayley’s live photos of the Sex Pistols were posted.
After the show Roberta and I made sure that people knew about the birthday party. Once we got back to the hotel room, Roberta said “We should have the party in Bob Gruen’s room: He has a suite down the hall. It’s much bigger than our room.” (She had bought a bottle of Courvoisier (a brand of cognac), Bob’s favorite drink back then.)
Since it was impossible to find booze in Tulsa at that hour, almost everyone who had been on the tour stopped by: the Sex Pistols (minus Johnny Rotten), Joe Stevens (the New Musical Express photographer who was on the entire tour and travelled with Malcolm), and a few other people I can’t remember… In fact at this point, 45-plus years later, I can barely remember much of anything. I’ll just post my account from the film script Richard Belfiore and I wrote 20 years ago, which was based on my notes from the tour and what was left of my memory back then. The dialogue isn’t verbatim, but this is what happened and what people said that night.
INT. HOLIDAY INN - HOTEL ROOM - NIGHT
A buzzed John happily guzzles a beer as he stands next to BOB GRUEN, a tour photographer. Several PARTYGOERS, including STEVE JONES AND PAUL COOK, stand around the hotel suite talking and drinking.
JOHN: Bob, thanks so much for letting us party here. Your room is definitely a lot bigger than mine.
BOB: My pleasure, John.
JOHN: What a weird thing, being on this tour and everything, right?
BOB: Oh yeah. You know what separates this tour from all the others I’ve been on? Aside from the obvious, like buses instead of jets, and the weird out-of-the-way ballrooms? This time, the whole world is watching.
John nods, finishes his beer, gives Bob the “one minute” sign and goes to the bar, where Roberta is fixing a drink.
JOHN: Roberta, this is the best birthday party I ever had! This is amazing!
ROBERTA: So far, so good! Whoa, look who just showed up!
As Roberta brings a drink to Steve Jones, the room gets quite as SID VICIOUS arrives with the GLAMOROUS BLONDE from Cain’s Ballroom. After they sit on a double bed in the middle of the room, Sid pulls out a bottle of Jack Daniels and takes a gulp .
VICIOUS (to everyone): Hey, does anyone have any drugs?
The BLONDE nods, reaches into her bra and removes a bag of weed and some rolling papers. John sits down across from them on the other double bed as she expertly rolls a joint.
JOHN: Hi, Sid! Thanks for coming to my birthday party.
VICIOUS: So it’s your birthday, is it? How old are you?
JOHN: Twenty-five.
VICIOUS: That’s great! I plan to kill me self before I get that old. I’m 20 and don’t want to live past 21.
John is about to answer when NOEL MONK barges in, accompanied by one of the Pistols’ bodyguards. When Noel sees the Blonde rolling a joint he grabs the pot from her and the party comes to a crashing halt.
NOEL: What the fuck do you think you’re doing? We’re in Tulsa, Oklahoma! I got enough problems trying to keep tabs on that pothead from High Times magazine.
Roberta and John share a look while Noel walks to the bathroom while the bodyguard glares at the rest of the room menacingly.
SOUND: TOILET FLUSHING
Noel emerges from the bathroom, annoyed and agitated.
NOEL: (to the Blonde) Do you have any more drugs on you?
The Blonde shakes her head, “No.”
NOEL: You’d better not, or else I’ll have to search you! Full cavity!
Noel goes to the bar and pours himself a drink, while the bodyguard looks over the bottles and pours one for himself.
VICIOUS: How’d you like the show tonight?
JOHN: It was okay, but Randy’s Rodeo was definitely the best!
VICIOUS: Was that the one where I got my nose all bloody? That was the best!
Noel signals wildly to John, who gets up from the bed and follows him to a far corner of the room.
NOEL: First off, I only agreed to let these guys come here tonight if you never, ever write about it, understood?
John reluctantly nods.
NOEL: Now if you cooperate with me, I’ll see to it that you get all the interviews you want in San Francisco. Here’s the deal. I’m trying to get this band to work together like real musicians, okay? Tonight’s show was great, because they played like a real rock and roll band. And I want you to tell that to Sid. Maybe they’ll start paying attention to the music and stop all the bullshit.
Noel sees Sid drinking whiskey and abruptly leaves to attend to him. Sid sees Noel coming towards him and acts like a schoolboy would to a headmaster.
VICIOUS: I’m being good, aren’t I, Noel?
Noel nods and snatches Sid’s bottle from him. He reaches for a pen and draws a line on it.
NOEL: Don’t drink past this point. See? Right there. You got that, Sid?
VICIOUS: Okay, Noel, whatever you say. I’m being good, right?
NOEL: You’re doing fine. See you later.
Noel hands Sid back his bottle, takes one last menacing look around the room, motions to Vinnie and exits. Everyone breathes a sigh of relief and the conversations resume.
VICIOUS: (To the Blonde) ‘Ere now, am I going to suck your cock or your cunt?
BLONDE: In a low, husky voice) Cunt!
The rest of the room reacts to her deep manly voice. John walks over to the bar and looks for another beer.
JOHN: Hey, where’d all the beer go?
BOB: All out, but try this. Just watch out, it’s powerful stuff!
Bob pours a small cup of Courvoisier for John.
JOHN: I’m an experienced drinker. I can handle anything!
John guzzles the drink, then pours himself another.
BOB: Whoa! Be careful with that, John.
As people enjoy the party and talk, John begins to feel queasy as the room starts to spin. He abruptly leaves the room.
INT. HOLIDAY INN HALLWAY
John races with his hand over his mouth, trying not to vomit. He runs all the way down the hall, reaches the door and drunkenly fumbles for the key.
INT. JOHN AND ROBERTA’S ROOM - HOLIDAY INN
As soon as John enters he VOMITS all over the floor, staggers to the bed, collapses in it and passes out cold.
NEXT WEEK: Leaving Tulsa
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